Registered: 1219248951 Posts: 1,606
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I really admire Sharon Osbourne (have for years -
way before their show). She always sounds so level headed and rational when talking about her relationship with Ozzy. The entertainment business is not usually where you find the most long-term or successful relationships but they have made it work and are still going strong. She says the secret to keeping things spicy in the bedroom is sex toys of course! She also says a little chocolate sauce doesn't hurt. But really, the key is "Patience. You have to love the person, respect them and be very tolerant." Very true. I'd only add communication to that list but it seems like they have it covered. What do you think it takes for a successful long-term relationship? source: EarthTimes.org __________________ Shop safe at Tabutoys.com Read our Sex Blog!
Registered: 1258125113 Posts: 366
Reply with quote #2
I agree with Sharon. (Can I substitute ice for the chocolate sauce?)
Tolerance is a necessary part of any long term relationship. We have to remember that we ourselves are not perfect and so we have to give our Significant Other the benefit of the doubt, and be tolerant to much of his or her mildly annoying tendencies (or even hugely annoying tendencies.) My Man and I have been together a long long time. We have been close to calling it quits a few times, but Love, Respect and Tolerance kept us together. (The sex toys sure never hurt!) Plus both of us were too damn stubborn to be the one to leave... Some say the thing that first attracts you to your lover is usually the thing that drives you crazy after a while. One of the things that attracted me to The Man was his honesty and his sense of persistence and dedication. (I love my own father, but he's a "I'm going to" guy, but rarely gets around to what he says he'll do.) Now, sometimes, when My Man says "I'm digging post holes for the new fence Saturday morning." He IS doing it, even in the pouring rain, even if he's sick, even if something else comes up. He can be honest to a fault, has a weird time with not realizing that people don't always want to know his real opinion. A friend once asked him if her new boyfriend seemed like a nice guy and he just said, "I think he's a big jerk. I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him." It hurt her feelings (and I was hoping the floor would just swallow me up) but later, the guy got weird and tried to hit her, and it turned out The Man was right about him. (Yes, she dumped the jerk immediately.) I don't ask him "Does this dress make my ass look big?" He'd usually answer "I don't think it's the dress." Drives me nuts. He was attracted to me because his family was SO intolerant, and judgmental and value the Status Quo, felt that Conformity was the Key to Life (if they even thought about it at all, which I doubt) and I have a more outlandish, freestyle approach to life. (His father used to refer to me a "My Hippy Pinko Daughter in Law." And not really in a nice way.....) It has given us friction. I feel that things like ironing clothes at ALL and dusting and vacuuming EVERY DAY are Entropic Activities and the time could be better spent reading (his family owns virtually NO books, we have a library in our house and book cases in every room) playing with children, talking to friends inperson or online, volunteering, shopping, or just staring into space. I refuse to fight entropy (As in constant cleaning) as it's a losing battle. His mother's house is like a museum (or a tomb) ours is a cluttered chaotic mess, with toys, and games and books and curiosities and comic books, and chess games going in several rooms, and dust and kids (HEY, that one isn't even OURS.) and dogs and clutter and more books. He has had to overcome a fear of Dust Bunnies (HIM: "OMG, what IS that?" ME: "It's a Dust Bunny. Leave it alone. They're good for you." and learn to live with a woman who will really NOT clean up after him, to a huge extent, although I will cook up a storm and love to make him happy that way (his mother followed him and his dad around with a dust cloth and a bucket of water and a sponge. Really. But, then again, NOT doing constant clean up means less nagging and I think that's a trade off many men would be happy to make. I saw nagging as the death of my parent's marriage.) and I have had to learn to live with brutal honesty and a Man's overwhelming desire to "Get things done NOW!" I know my sense of Freedom and lack of conformity attracted him to me. I was his "Anti-Mother" but it still irritates him if he comes home and there are dishes in the sink, toys all over (The Kids, I always put OURS away) surfaces are sticky and the mail is still out in the mailbox. We've had to put away each of our ideas of "the right way" of doing things to save our relationship. It's hard, damn hard. But, if you look at your partner as a human being, not a perfect Knight in Armor or a Wood Nymph in a Martha Stewart apron (unless you're role playing, then it's fine) the Tolerance and Respect become easier and the LOVE flows. I also think that , imaginative, mutually enjoyable sex (with, of course, some mercy sex thrown in, because no TWO people can be in the same frame of mind all the time at the same time) is also an often left out Key to a good long term relationship. It does make a difference. Maybe we are different, but we frequent do get along better the more we get it on. Sorry for the long post. It just hit me as important. __________________ I can be tolerant of almost anything....except Intolerance........and Dairy Products
Registered: 1219248951 Posts: 1,606
Reply with quote #3
Originally Posted by
P Gell I also think that , imaginative, mutually enjoyable sex (with, of course, some mercy sex thrown in, because no TWO people can be in the same frame of mind all the time at the same time) is also an often left out Key to a good long term relationship. It does make a difference. Maybe we are different, but we frequent do get along better the more we get it on. So true... __________________ Shop safe at Tabutoys.com Read our Sex Blog!
Registered: 1228053875 Posts: 471
Reply with quote #4
Bravo, P'Gell! Very well stated. I would like to throw just a little more into the mix. To The Man, you are the anti-Mother. Mine wasnt that bad...there was just no tolerance for a messy house...and no discussion of sex.
The little more I want to throw in is this...Dreamer is the Anti-Wife. And I mean that in a good way. Everything that she is...my wives were not. I cant imagine I am the easiest man to live with. Dreamer does a very good job of putting up with my smart ass. And where sex...the pleasure, enjoyment, fullfillment of it...was a chore for others that have gone before...it is the glue that holds us together (even tho we have not been together that long). We never go to bed angry or mad with the other...we emotionally support each other...we hold hands as often as possible. I suppose the big difference between me and The Man is I am a starter of projects. Some get done...some lay dormant for awhile. Bad weather? My butt is staying in the house. Sick? No work for me! But Dreamer knows... __________________ Lovin My Wife...Lovin Life http://bluelizardbar.blogspot.com/?zx=17474cbdabf4a835