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ireallywanttoknow

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Reply with quote  #1 
Now I know that every woman has fantasies just the same as all of us guys.  I have no problems telling my wife what I fantasize about however, my wife claims that she has no fantasies.  She claims that she is perfectly happy with what is going on in our sex life.  I have told her "thats a good thing but I know you fantasize about something.  We don't have to act on them just share them."  I believe she thinks that I will judge her and does not want to share out of fear.  I assure you just as I have tried to assure her this will not happen.  I'm wondering if there are any games out there that encourage this discussion.  I may be in the market for that game.  Also if you have any other ideas about how to get her to talk I would love to hear them.
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Roadie

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Reply with quote  #2 
Dont feel bad IRWK...I have the same problem. I have ask Dreamer many times over the last 2 1/2 years what her fantasies are. And I usually get the same answer...'none that I can think of'. She knows I won't say anything about them or judge her...just a topic of discussion. If she doesn't want to act on them...fine. But being the uberhorney dude I am, I like hearing about sex fantasies.

As far as games...I have found that making them up is just as much fun as buying one from the store. One of them I made up is called "10 Question Strip Poker". We all know how fast a straight game of strip poker can go (unless you have on 47 articles of clothes). So instead of removing something every time you lose a hand, you have to answer a question...a sex question. Clothes come off about every third hand or so. It helps if the questions are very specific...not generalized...like "what's your sex fantasy?" More like..."whats your favorite position to be fucked in?" And there is no right or wrong answer.

It worked for us...and it did open some topics of discussion.

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Plum Pudding

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Reply with quote  #3 
Speaking only for myself, I never have any elaborate or big sex fantasies.  My husband has asked me the same question. I have sex acts that I may want but normally what I want is simple and to the point.  That and normally if it is something I want to try or do my husband has brought it up or asked to try it. 
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P Gell

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Reply with quote  #4 
With a few exceptions, I usually hem and haw and pretend I can't talk (LOL!) because mine are more nasty than his are. Even after all these years, there are still things I think would freak him out. And, a few of them are things that are just fantasies and I do not want to do IRL.
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Hank Alvarez

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For what it's worth I've only had one lover who admitted to having fantasies. And with her it started with me asking her to close her eyes and visualize what she would like done to her; kiss her all over, go down on her, missionary, doggie sex, etc. You get the idea. And it worked.  Try it. Hank
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Roadie

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P'Gell...you have brought up an interesting point. Are your fantasies too nasty? You'd have to define what 'too nasty' is. And how do you know they would freak him out unless you ask him? And the just fantasies? I would love to know what those are!

But now it makes me wonder if Dreamer doesnt share fantasies for the same reasons you have described...

Hey, Dreamer........................................

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Faleena

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Reply with quote  #7 
I'm in the same boat as Plum. Honestly, I'm not really that much of a visual/psychological person, so while aesthetics do matter somewhat, I'm focusing more on sensations and what feels really good. So the few fantasies I have aren't very elaborate.

ireallywanttoknow, maybe you should try heading down to Spencer's and checking out some of their adult games. That's the only place I've really seen much like that.
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dreamer60
Reply with quote  #8 
Roadie, my Love,...this isn't the case with me. As you have pointed out, I have had exceptional sexual experience. The fact is that some things are better left as fantasy. The few fantasies I have experienced have been good, but most did fall below the average expectations I may have created in my own mind.
I think actually planning to fulfill a fantasy can diminish it at times.
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ireallywanttoknow

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Reply with quote  #9 
Faleena thats what I was asking about.  I am wondering if there is a game that may be particularly good at drawing someone to talk about fantasies they may have.
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Plum Pudding

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Reply with quote  #10 
The few fantasies I have experienced have been good, but most did fall below the average expectations I may have created in my own mind.
I think actually planning to fulfill a fantasy can diminish it at times.


Dreamer I must agree with you there are some fantasies that are best left in your mind. That and sometimes if you plan it and it doesn't come out as plan it can really mess up a good fantasy. I love to just let things come naturally. My husband and I have had some good times with things that we just didn't expect or that was spontaneous.

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Tabu Toypro

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Reply with quote  #11 
Check out the Discover Your Lover game or the Hot Affair. They are both designed to get you talking, fantasizing and then acting!
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P Gell

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Reply with quote  #12 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roadie

P'Gell...you have brought up an interesting point. Are your fantasies too nasty?
  YES!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roadie
You'd have to define what 'too nasty' is. And how do you know they would freak him out unless you ask him? And the just fantasies? I would love to know what those are!
  Most of them just are fantasies. The closest we've come is the "hand cuff incident." LOL! And that was soft core....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roadie
Hey, Dreamer........................................
She ain't telling either, probably for similar reasons, as well as the "the imaginary can often be more stimulating than the Real Life thing." (wink to Dreamer)  We girls are nastier than you  guys, it's a well known fact. LOL! And we're not trying to be mysterious or coy, it's just our imaginations and the way Nature made some of us. Sometimes you can't even help what you are thinking....

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Hank Alvarez

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Reply with quote  #13 
I want to toss this one out to the class. After having a lot of years to think about it I wonder if a lot of people are embarrassed by their sexual fantasies? I'm not. I'm to damned old to care now and I readily reveal them to my spouse. Sometimes I think she's a little shocked but that's not necessarily a bad thing as it was that innocence that attracted me to her in the first place. After all, a lot of us were raised in cultures that believe sex was dirty. As a result we don't talk about it and I was taught in church that it was a sin just to think about it. Ponder that one for a moment and tell me what you think.

And if that's not screwy enough try this one. I've got a pretty decent porn collection, which I enjoy watching I suspect more than my wife. And the curious thing is that when I'm watching some of my favorites doing something really outrageous I'm thinking of my wife. She doesn't believe it but it's true. HHH
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Plum Pudding

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Reply with quote  #14 
you know what hank i have realized that some of my fantasies or things i just plain old want to do, i was embarrased to say or i felt like i was just plain nasty. i have come to realize why. among my friends i am more open about things and when i verbalize it i get the stares or everyone gets quiet and it makes me feel like hmm maybe i am some nasty perverted woman. i am just, in the past months or so just being open and saying what i want and not caring what anyone thinks or feel about it. it all comes down to what i personally enjoy as well as my husband. I think that's why i get great enjoyment from this forum because i don't feel like i am the only one who is like me.
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studley

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Reply with quote  #15 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hank Alvarez

I want to toss this one out to the class. After having a lot of years to think about it I wonder if a lot of people are embarrassed by their sexual fantasies. I'm not. I'm to old to care now and I readily reveal them to my spouse and sometimes I think she's a little shocked. After all, a lot of us were raised to believe that it was dirty. Ponder that one for a moment and tell me what you think. Hank


I am not embarrassed by what few fantasies I have. They are not wild or kinky. Usually they consist of doing the deed with someone who is open and really enjoys sex. I'd never tell my wife about it though.
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