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somenew

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Reply with quote  #1 
Hi, here is a new bee wanting to enter the world of toys. I am 56 and married to my beautiful, loving and willing wife. Till 2006 we had great love life satisfying for both on physical and emotional level. I faced some adversities which pulled me down and last 2 years has been very little sex. The post 2006 events affected my libido and I was drowned in my miseries. The New Year came with light in our lives and I am feeling like normal. We are eager to catch up and makeup for the lost time.
I sufferer from mild ED for which Viagra has been prescribed. The other issue is premature ejaculation. I have been looking around at :-

Vibrating C Rings mainly to enhance erection and for clitoris stimulation. I am not sure which one to buy as I feeling that not all positions will give benefit of constant clit stimulation i.e. doggy, missionary.  Any suggestions ?

Penis Extensions to carryon if I lose erection and to supplement both length and girth. I don’t understand what material is best. My concern is after losing erection how will the extension hold unless I go for strap on.
I would appreciate all the help on specific queries and any other suggestion.

Thanks
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Belladonna

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Reply with quote  #2 
how about using a delay spray?
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Tabu Toypro

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Reply with quote  #3 
Hi somenew -

On your penis extension question - my favorite design is the Cyberskin Cock Booster. Has a "ball strap" on the end which acts as a cockring as well as a strap to keep it on. It'll give you a couple of inches in length as well as a half inch of girth all the way around. It's not as floppy as the straight cyberskin sleeves are, plus the strap is effective.

On the rings - you probably won't find one that'll give her continued clitoral pressure. Vary up your positions to see how it'll work best for her and if you can't quite get it, no biggie, remove the bullet and use it on her while you wear the ring. Specifically, the Elite 7x7 Exciter Ring. It's a double ring, designed to pull the larger ring back behind the scrotum for a tighter fit. The bullet has 7 vibration patterns and the motor is nice and quiet.

Hope these help!

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ethen

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Reply with quote  #4 
the vibrating rings could be of much help. you can try these rings easily as these are easily adjustable and you can even control the pace of vibration as some special rings comes with remote controls as well.
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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #5 
Awesome!  First, let me say congratulations on being able to be honest and open up to asking for help and advice.  At 56 that's quite the feat, as a lot of your male peers are afraid to talk about the natural biological changes in their bodies.  I continue to be amazed at how strong generational values can be, especially when talking (or NOT talking) about sexuality.  Even in today's age of sexual liberalness, those childhood societal values still are pretty strong and keep many men from seeking the help they need to reclaim the joys of sex.

That being said, time to strap in (pun not intended) as this post is a bit lengthy, but I like to exhaustively answer questions.  In other words, you were warned! LOL. I'm going to answer your question in 3 parts.  The first part is a primer on sex toys.  The 2nd is a safety warning.  The 3rd is my personal recommendations on which toys to purchase for your needs (budget needs aside).


Part 1 - The Basics of Sex Toys

When your purchasing your sex toys there are many factors to consider, but the key ones I usually focus on are:
[list]
[li](a) Know the Sex Toy Market[/li]
[li](b) Purpose Dictates Choice[/li]
[li](c) Usage: Alone or Together?[/li]
[li](d) Effect and Precaution[/li]
[li](e) The Budget[/li]
[/list]

[color=black](a) As you are a beginner when it comes to sex toys, you should try to choose the perfect toy so your not stuck with a $25-50+ lump of junk. Research the sex toys market, leave little room for mistakes.

(b) Once you have got the research out of the way, its time to look at the purpose of the sex toys. The purpose of most sex toys is to stimulate and/or penetrate. The purpose, therefore, is the key to making the right choice.

(c) Another factor that dictates the choice of the sex toy is the usage. You might want to use it as a solo sex toy or might want to get your partner into the act. The end user dictates the needs of the product. The toy must be something that the intended user(s) can have fun with, and in your case at the same time.

(d) All sex toys need to be used AND stored, keeping specific instructions in mind. You need to be extra careful with the use of some sex toys, especially of the kinky variety. Say, you are using a sex toy like the cock ring. One of the precautions to be maintained is that you need to stop using them after around 20 minutes. If you are not aware of this you can damage the penile channels responsible for blood flow and erection. BTW, generally cock rings are not considered kinky, I was just making an example.

(e) The price of the sex toy is an important factor that needs to be considered, while choosing the toy. Sex toys are available in varying price range, and it's your budget limitation that decides which price range you zero in on. Some of the functional sex toys are economical, while the luxury sex toys are quite expensive. Search the market thoroughly for the kind of sex toy that fits your budget.

While shopping you may end up seeing dollar signs, especially if you look at high end toys, but I assure you that just like any other purchase you can make your sex toys should be considered an investment.  You wouldn't buy just any car to get you around, and you shouldn't take sex toys lightly either (the joy they are meant to provide aside). Additionally, consider the safety of your product when considering how much to spend.



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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #6 
Part 2 - Safety is Key: The Secret You Need to Know

Safety is among the top concern you should have after function.  A little known fact about sex toys are that a lot of them contain something called pthalates, which you should be aware of.  It is very important in fact, [color=red]pthalates can harm you.

Phthalates are a family of industrial chemicals that are used as plastic softeners in many different consumer products. They can be absorbed through the skin, and studies have shown that phthalates can damage the liver, the kidneys, the lungs and the reproductive system, especially the developing testes. I believe that most, if not all, the toys offered by TabuToys are pthalate free.

You should talk to your vendor and ask questions about the specific effect of the toy and the kind of precautions to be taken both before, during and after use. It's advisable to buy a toy that is durable and one that can be cleaned easily. Most sex toys can be hand cleaned with simple antibacterial soap and warm water.  This helps you maintain a satisfactory level of hygiene and ensures that you can use your toy for years to come.

Certain types of toys depending upon the material they are made from, such as the recommended Cyberskin, have very specific care instructions. One particular piece of information that is [color=red]VERY IMPORTANT
is that some toys can not be stored touching one another, as the chemicals in them will interact causing damage to your product.  This may sound scary but you don't need to be worried, just educate yourself about your product.

For more on Cyberskin you can see read this very informative post by UnderBedToys an eBay retailer LINK REMOVED SINCE YOU CAN GET THAT INFO HERE

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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #7 
Part 3 - Let's Get It On! - My Product Recomendations

Now, as to which cock ring you should use?  If you really want a cock ring to help with maintaining an erection with a little extra bang for the buck (pun intended), then I can recommend no other ring more highly then the Lelo Bo.

The BO is from Swedish toy manufacturer Lelo.  You probably don't know who they are, but let me tell you that they mean serious business when it comes to designing top notch pleasure products.  They design their products using the natural anatomy of the human body to maximize pleasure and they are all rechargable and waterproof.

Lelo Bo

Product Link:
http://www.tabutoys.com/product/LELO_BO_Deep_Blue_Gentleman_s_Ring





WE Vibe II

Now, for the question du jour.  You wanted a vibrating cock ring, and I gave you one, but if I might suggest a solution that will give your partner a little more pleasure?  I suggest that you take a look at the WE Vibe II.  I could try to explain this one, but let's just say it's easier to watch the manufacturers advertising video. For your convenience, I've included a link below.

[color=black]Product Link:
http://www.tabutoys.com/product/WE_Vibe_II




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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #8 
So, as you can see there is a lot to learn about sex toys, but PLEASE don't let this intimidate you or stop you from enjoying yourself and the pleasures that sex toys can bring you and your partner.  Just be bold and ask questions and make sure you know about your product. I highly encourage you to buy your toys and other products from a reputable vendor like TabuToys.  They know their stuff so they an answer your questions with confidence, and have proven over the years that what they sell is top notch only!

I also recommend that you find a good lube that you and her are happy with. While I did not see you mention your wifes age, I can say that women of all ages should learn to use lube even if they are already well lubricated women.  Why? Simple science really, friction.  Friction can cause vaginal irration, and let's face it mother nature can't always compete with modern science.  Lubricants are designed to help your sex sessions by making things more comfortable for her.

I personally rave about the KY Yours+Mine lube, it's just a lot of fun.  The specially formulated lubes provide unique cooling and warming sensations for each of you and is condom safe (which may or may not be an issue for you.)

However, true to my spirit in being thorough, be aware of two things.  There have been some concerns over the contents, mainly the ingredient sodium hydroxide.  I pride myself in exhaustive knowledge of the sex industry and have yet to see any substantial proof of this concern, however, you should know what it can do.

Sodium Hydroxide in strong concentrations is extremely corrosive and is capable of causing severe burns. However, the concentrations in the product are not really strong for such to happen.  In fact they are very diluted. However, owing to its corrosive nature, repeated or prolonged skin contact even with very diluted amounts of the chemical may possibly cause drying, cracking, and inflammation of the skin (dermatitis). Again, I stress NOT to worry, just make sure you know what your buying and be a smart consumer. Also, pay attention when using a product to see how your body reacts.

Additionally, the ingredients do contain glycerin which can, and commonly does, lead to yeast infection.  You should talk to your wife about her own body to know if she is prone to getting a yeast infection.  Otherwise, it is a very fun lube. 

If KY Yours+Mine is not a viable option, then I also recommend Eros Bodyglide (link below), which is condom safe (again, may or may not be an issue), can double for a massage oil without leaving the skin sticky, and lot's of fun because it's waterproof.  Hint: the toys I recommended are also waterproof. *wink wink*


Product Link:http://www.tabutoys.com/product/Pjur_Eros_Original_Silicone_Lubricant_3_4_oz_


If you have any other questions, please feel free to drop me a message at my email address, which you can find in my profile. I will be more than happy to help in any way I can.

(ModNotes, I hope that's allowed? Also, the system wouldn't let me post this as one single post.  I kept getting 500 time out errors.)


Note: Information about choosing a sex toy, courtesy of Kevin Fedorr: http://vibrators-sex-toys.blogspot.com/2010/02/buying-your-first-sex-toy-various.html

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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #9 
One nice thing about the Lelo BO is that its small profile makes is fun to wear upside down too, so you can tickle yourself for stimulation if your using it with an extension.  On the issue of an extension, I do NOT recommend that you use one without a strap-on harness. 

These kinds of toys are difficult to wear and stay on, and I am speaking from experience. Even though I am naturally endowed, I have had partners with a size fetish who have asked me to use such a device. The neccesary function is being able to aim and control the shaft and head of these toys.  Doing so without a strapon harness is difficult, if not downright frustrating.  In choosing a harness, also consider the material and the issue of chafing.  Again, talk to your vendor.

Also, consider the material your extension is made of.  Latex is notorious for not transmitting body heat and therefore may feel unnatural and possibly even unpleasant to your partner.  I do recommend the Cyberskin material, but you should use a condom (yes, I understand the "huh?" in your head) because of the porous materials surface.   You don't want stuff getting in the material which will degrade your investment.  Remember, Cyberskin needs to be cleaned after every use. As always, know how to properly care for your product.

As a final thought on all of this, I'd like to point out that you should not expect sex to be optimal at first when your getting used to using toys.  Don't plan romantic evenings while introducing new toys.  If you don't know how to use a toy optimally, then your setting yourself up for disapointment.  Play with your new toys during casual fun times, and introduce them into your regular sex regimen, including romantic encounters, only AFTER you've become familiar and knowledgable with their use and care.  In other words, just think of them as a tool.  Learn how to use it before your on the job.  *wink*

I'd like to point out that you are an example of an excellent lover for so thoughtfully considering her needs before your own pride.  I commend you, and wish you all the best. Good luck and as I always like to say jokingly, "have a good one".

-Doc


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Tabu Toypro

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Reply with quote  #10 
Whoa.
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Roadie

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Reply with quote  #11 
Yeah...thats what I said!

Welcome to Tabu, Dr. Erotic!

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askdrerotic

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Reply with quote  #12 
So, uh, I had a phone call with one of the forum moderators, and I guess I am a little TOO exhaustive. LOL. In the future, I will try make my posts shorter for everyone's convenience.  I am sorry if anyone was put off by such a long post.

-Doc

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Tabu Toypro

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Reply with quote  #13 
We know you're excited about offering up your services, er advice. And I'm sure your site will be top notch when it's up. Good luck!
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Leoskorn

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Reply with quote  #14 
I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. A good cock ring used with a penis pump should keep you erect for a longer duration during intercourse. Just throw out that Viagra and start pumping.
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Adriana

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Reply with quote  #15 
I find the term 'new bee' really cute. It's "newbie" but I might like bee better! Good luck!
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