The Man and I had an LDR when I was away at college. It was his idea that we have an Open Relationship. As with most things sexual, I was reluctant at first and then found it great! We discovered I had the ability to be Polyamorous, and he
didn't. (He's a Scorpio, and scarily monogamous, evidentially.) He informed me if he had a lover and it kind of hurt, but he's a painfully honest guy, and he wasn't trying to be mean, just honest. Years later, when we became monogamous he once told me, during a Drunk that he "wanted to kill all those other guys you were with." OMG! Not that he's DO it, just that it upset him that much, We also found out that all his complaining that I wasn't "rugged" enough was for the best. (I'm a girl, what did he want?) Two of the women he dated during this Open Relationship time "cheated" on him.......with other chicks...... Their mistake was lying about it. He hates lying. Now, if he ever complains that I am not "rugged" enough (despite the fact that I am tough) or he says something like "stop being a pussy about it." I can say, "I have a pussy, but I don't need one from someone else. Please review your "rugged women" and the trouble that gave you. Deal with my feminine wiles." He also has terrible "Les-Dar" he'll think a woman is hot, and about a quarter of the time, I'll have to inform him, "She's a dyke, honey." Then we'll both intone, "Not that there's anything wrong with that." He had the biggest crush on our babysitter, who is a lesbian and he wouldn't believe me! We finally had her over for dinner......with her "husband." "Oh. I guess she's bi." He said. NO, she's a lesbian. You can learn interesting things about your lover by having an at least temporary Open Relationship, but you have to be prepared if either one of you finds someone you like better. It's a hazard. I'm glad we did it because I was very young and a virgin when I first started dating him, and if we hadn't had that time, I would probably be constantly wondering what other men were like. I think it was good for us, I KNOW it was. But, there are things you need to be able to accept. Jealousy is not something that works well in an Open Relationship. In fact, his reaction to my other lovers was the main reason we have not investigated Swinging. I don't think he could handle it, even though he thinks he could.....
I can be tolerant of almost anything....except Intolerance........and Dairy Products