blanca
HELP!  I'm in my early 30's and have never been able to really have an orgasm by penetration.  Are there any tips for a desparate gal?  I can orgasm by clitoral stimulation fine but during sex I feel like I'm thinking about it too hard.  I end up faking orgasm and as my relationship with my boyfriend grows stronger and we talk about marriage, I feel sooo bad for faking it.  The sex is great, what's wrong with me?
Quote 0 0
Adriana
IF the sex is great, enjoy it! There is nothing wrong with you if you haven't managed to orgasm vaginally and you don't need to in order to have a satisfying sex life. You shouldn't be stressing about it to the point of being unhappy or detracting from the good sex you already have.

If you want to learn how to orgasm from sex, I'd suggest picking up a book or clicking over to a website with in depth information about the G-spot. Tabu currently carries this one: http://www.tabutoys.com/product/Female_Ejaculation_and_the_G_spot_Guide (but could maybe expand their line?)

A G-spot toy couldn't hurt, either. Tabu has a whole section of G-spot toys: http://www.tabutoys.com/subcategory/G_spot_vibrators Get ready to experiment with your G-spot before penetration because it'll be easier to obtain that elusive orgasm if you get to know yourself first.
Quote 0 0
Tabu Toypro
Exactly. Blanca, you are only making it harder by focusing on it so much. There are many, many women who need a more than vaginal penetration to have an orgasm. If you are hell-bent on it, then ask your fiance to give you a little oral stimulation (or with fingers) before you start having physical sex.

You need to get your mind out of it and relax. Can't stress that enough. Once he's got you to the point of no return, stop him and climb on top. You're more likely to have an O in this position. Ride him in a slightly diagonal pattern(think of going towards 2 o'clock instead of high noon) and eventually you should be able to find your "spot" and make it work.

It's not going to happen every time. Be ok with that. There's no rule that says you both have to cum together. If he cares about this, he'll help you too. He can always watch you or help you masturbate after so you can acheive an orgasm. Or whip out a finger toy...

You can always try having a fantasy instead of thinking about the orgasm itself. Your boyfriend does not need to know the contents of your fantasy. Get as raunchy as you want - it's safe and locked away in your head just for you.

But more than anything, please, please, please stop faking it. Does he actually think you're simultaneously cumming?
Shop safe at Tabutoys.com
Read our Sex Blog!
Quote 0 0
naughtyeliot
I don't really have anything to add to what Adriana and Toypro posted. Their advice was right on the mark. I hope it's helpful. :-)
Quote 0 0
Hank Alvarez
Have you tried fingering your clit at the same time that he's thrusting into you? This is no joke. I'm very serious. A young lady I knew had basically the same problem. She liked to hug and "hang on" while her lovers were thrusting into her but she could seldom have an orgasm that way. She was embarrassed and too afraid of what her lover would think but fortunately for her he had enough sense to suggest that she finger massage her clit while they were getting it on. After that she came a lot more often and with greater intensity. They also used a lot of cock rings with vibrating clit brushes too. You might want to try it if you think your boyfriend's ego can handle it. Hank
Quote 0 0
Adriana
She did say she can orgasm clitorally during sex, Hank.
Quote 0 0