Probably the biggest thing I've encountered on websites like CollarMe and Alt.com are dominant women who will seem very interested, and then disappear when I say I'm not interested in casual play or a pay-by-the-hour relationship. And the very small selection of dommes I get on with are either already in relationships or geographically distant.
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Adriana
Have you tried bondage.com or even myspace? Craigslist might be an option, too.

I would also browse the web for local groups or munches where you can meet others who are interested. You may try this site: http://www.domsubfriends.com/a-wwwdir/org.shtml
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