passionatephonix

 To You is Sex all fun or just something to do? votes

 All Fun 3 votes
75%
 Something To Do 1 vote
25%
This poll has been closed.
I am a 22 year old mom with a 28 year old boyfriend.. I feel i am a very sexual person.. and we tend to have a little bit of a Dom/sub roll between us when it comes to our sex-life.. me being the sub.. now I love my boyfriend very much but When it comes to Sex we dont have it that often.. He says its because hes 28 years old and doesnt have a raging hard-on like he did when he was in his early 20s..

I have talked to other men that are OLDER than my boyfriend and are dear friends to me if this was normal because i have never had an issue with it before..

I dont really want it all the time but more than once or twice a week would be great!

Any ideas on what i could do to help spark things to happen for us more??
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Eesh. When a guy tells you he isn't into sex because he's 28 that sounds like trouble. Every guy in his 20's is a walking hard-on. They usually don't see a dip in their sex drive until late 30's early 40's.
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passionatephonix
I dont want to think that something could be wrong or trouble.. I love my man and I want him to want me more.. I just dont know what i can do..
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I felt this way too after I had my second child. I felt fat and unappreciated and I think maybe my insecurities mixed with my overweight made me less attractive to my husband..or in my head it did. (I don't know if this is your problem though.) Anyway, I got a gym memebrship and started working out 3 times a week and cut out the bread. After about 4 months I was looking GOOD and he definitely noticed. Now the sex is better than ever. I think the biggest reason why is that I feel better about MYSELF and it shows.
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kourtnei
I really dnt know because my boyfriend is 28 he'll be 29 in december and we have sex all the time not to mention the fact that I cant sleep with out it and he's the same
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Rosy Glow
Do you have sex about twice a week? If you guys live together, that's not bad! You read about couples who maybe get it on once a month! Maybe instead of putting the spotlight on him and asking why he's not as horny, you might want to turn it on yourself. Tell him how his denials to your advances make you feel. Or maybe try morning sex? Hard ons are pretty much a given in the a.m. Tell him how much he turns you on, etc.

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passionatephonix
Rosy Glow wrote:

Do you have sex about twice a week? If you guys live together, that's not bad! You read about couples who maybe get it on once a month! Maybe instead of putting the spotlight on him and asking why he's not as horny, you might want to turn it on yourself. Tell him how his denials to your advances make you feel. Or maybe try morning sex? Hard ons are pretty much a given in the a.m. Tell him how much he turns you on, etc.



haha i like this anwser its funny hee hee!!

and since i posted this thread things have gotten a little more firsky thank goodness! I was worried but i understand he just doesnt want it all the time and i cant say i blame him there are times that i dont want it all the time.  We have talked about it too.. thank you everyone for your advice its apriciated!
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Hank Alvarez
You know God must have a really mean sense of humor to have created such perfect beings and then designed our functions to be just about the opposite. Consider this: men are almost always horny, but on work days, we're usually the horniest at night. In comparison, after chasing the kids all day mama's tired and she really isn't that interested. Some days you couldn't interest her with roses, champaign and chocolate.  So the next morning we're getting dressed at o'dark thirty and we're preoccupied with thinking about how we're going to earn our daily bread and most of the women I've known are horniest at that time. That's really a dirty trick if you think about it and it isn't fair. That explains why a lot of married guys only get it 2.1 times a week, if they're lucky. Now if mama works too, and that's not that uncommon these days, there are more variable to the problem and it's even worse.

And if that's not bad enough, we get off in half the time the gals do. Then when we get older we have this damned refractory period that lasted twenty minutes when we were in our late twenties and it can grow to a couple of hours as you age. I'll just bet she's, (God), sitting up their on her cloud laughing her ass off at us because a guy wouldn't do this to another guy.

Enjoy the animal lust all you can while you're young because as the older you get, sex becomes an IQ test. You can have an obligatory quickie, (the wham bam thank you ma'am), if that's all you want, or the two of you can put your heads together and out think the problem. Trust me, when you do you can have some really great sex. Get your mate to help. When you do it's a lot of fun. Hank 
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Homer
I think if you 'feel sexy', that will be evident...and if there's anything to your relationship, your bf will take notice...My wife and I have a very healthy sex life, and i think i respond to her more when she is just doing her own thing..if she were 'all over me' and trying too hard...that might be a turnoff...nothing wrong with being a little suggestive, and a little bit of a tease...make him work for it from time to time..a little bit of intrigue goes a long way..
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SleepingDreamer
My husband is just a little shy of 30 and I'm lucky if I get it twice a week. When he was 23 we'd be able to have sex 4 or 5 times a day. But our lives have changed- he works more, has a family to provide for, and a lot more bills to stress about. Being a parent has taken a toll on him and he constantly worries about the future, especially since his job contract ends in 6 months.

Your best bet is to open the lines of communication- how was your day? I know my husband hates to talk about his job because it usually makes him angry. Just ask him about him, it doesn't have to be work related. Ask him, what would make you feel good today? Or if he gets home late be sure to tuck yourself away in the bedroom with a porno on, maybe seeing that will entice him into getting out of his routine (it worked for me last week! .. Ask him what his fantasies are, if there's anything you could do to help him wind down and relax.. a blow job, perhaps?

Have the house cleaned (a messy house will put a stop to sex) and DECLUTTER YOUR BEDROOM!!!! Having too much clutter in a bedroom will cause terrible sleep patterns- it overstimulates, keeps you awake, and stresses you out. Besides just reeking havoc on your sleep it hurts your sex life as well. Instead of looking around and feeling comfortable you're reminded you have to do laundry by the pile of clothes spilling out of the hamper, that you need to organize your closets by the things stacked on the dresser, etc.

Have a meal ready for him, something light- if it sits too heavy on his stomach it will make him tired and full. Try a salad with a chicken breast- want a quick way to make tasty chicken? Marinate it in Italian dressing and broil it= E A S Y. You could try a steak too, protein is an instant sex drive boost for my husband- just make sure it isn't too pink in the middle else he might run straight for the bathroom and trust me, that will kill any mood.

Oh, and wear lingerie. There is nothing that says, "I desire you and I want to show off my body for you" or "let's fuck" better than something that looks sexy and makes you feel sexy, because when YOU feel sexy he will too.
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BettyGolden
Have you considered watching some porn movies with your boyfriend? maybe this can spice things up a little bit..
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Hank Alvarez
I hate to say it but overall you two don't sound too well matched. I'd warn you not to let it go further than boyfriend girlfriend. One thing is to be sexually frustrated now but when you've got three rug rats and a curtain climber around the house it might be just too much. All of your friends above have given you good advice my advice is only for you to be cautious. Hank
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